sidewalk.

my biggest flaw is the fact that i am the most non-confrontational person you will ever meet. it absolutely aches my soul when it comes to dishing it back to someone who is in the wrong. i have literally spent my entire existence as a sidewalk; people walking all over me. not really paying attention to the cracks or the way the cement has split from the edges in some places. no one really noticed the hills or plateaus or the unevenness in some parts. just something to walk on. my whole life. until recently. i was tired of people cancelling plans because someone better offered something cooler. like a concert or a bar crawl or a study break. or ditching me because i sometimes fall asleep in front of the tv on friday nights. or decide that we can’t be friends anymore but there isn’t a reason. i have footprints to last me a lifetime of every single person who has walked all over me. ya know, the ones who have no problem borrowing clothes from my closet but would never actually acknowledge my kindness. the ones who celebrate all of their friends on social media posts but have never once shouted you out. you know what i am talking about. or maybe you are lucky and don’t. maybe you are a railing. something people hold onto for support but rarely walk on; if ever.

lately i have been desiring a break from the heavy feet; a break from being stomped across. a break from feeling the heaviness of people who don’t care. i took a step into confrontation. and let me tell you that while i had like six panic attacks in the process, i walked away feeling a little taller. it’s hard to speak up when all you’ve ever been is shut down. it’s hard to make yourself heard when no one ever listens. it’s hard to rise up from the sidewalk when everyone has been standing on you.

even if it’s uncomfortable, do it. tell someone that you’re not gonna make plans again since they keep cancelling. you deserve better than that. tell someone to cut the drama. because ain’t nobody got time for that. lay it out for the person who posted her brunch on snapchat after cancelling on your brunch date because she was ‘not feeling well’. dish it to the person who offended you at work. none of us were told to lie down. none of us have to live low. none of us were made to be what others walk upon. and while it may make you cry {believe me, i always cry after a confrontation}; it’s worth it. you deserve to be more than what is walked on. you are not a doormat. you are not a sidewalk. you are a railing. strong. sturdy. supportive. own that. be that. and screw anyone who is putting their ugly shoes on you.

so grab onto yourself for support and confront the hell out of what is laying on your soul. if it’s not feeding your soul, it’s not welcome anymore.

xo.